Individuation - 32

Tuesday poem

I was encouraged to write a poem about childhood experiences.

In and out of quarantine due to a rare and allegedly terminal illness, I spent more time alone than most children and learned how not to depend on others but to rely on myself for emotional stability. I never knew when, or if, my parents were ever going to return to take me home.

Intead of wondering, and feeling sad, I let my imgination take over. This is where my love of writing poetry started. I used to write fantasy stories about what I saw outside my hospital window.

I can safely say my adult relationships and friendships are not co-dependent as a result of spending so much time alone.

As an adult this has helped shape my friendships. My friendships are borne out of respect and patience, giving my friends the distance they may need at times.

My family has never been kind to me, so standing apart from them, and stepping away from their false love and false care to trick me into a relationship with them was easier for me than most, given that I was so alone in childhood.

I spent years without touch, too fragile to even be held. Although I am now an adult, and my body is not as fragile as it was in childhood, that fragility still lives within my heart.

If I give it to you, hold it with care.

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